I think I am slowly going insane here in Australia because I don’t have anyone to be weird with. I just can’t throw all of that onto these people. I freak my good friends and family out some times because I am that weird. I may physically explode soon from just showing off the normal, smiling girl that people can deal with. I want to be able to make dinosaur noises and squeal when I’m happy. I just need to dance around in the most unattractive, unappealing ways. I just need to flop around and talk about shit that is not built for dinner tables, but for 4am out in empty streets. I just need to be weird and be myself, but I’m not sure how to get to that point with all these new people. All my best friends have been slowly eased into it because they met me through other people that I was comfortable with. I don’t have that buffer person here and alcohol is too fucking expensive to get rid of my worries about being too weird. How the fuck did I do this before? I don’t understand how I have so many beautiful, weird ass people in my hometown and at Mason. I just can’t seem to get there here. Is that because I’m older and people expect me to be more civilized? If so, fuck that.. I’m just out here trying to make things awkward and get fucking weird. Howl at the moon and talk about how bad my shoes smell type shit.